I guess I am just a "Selfish Mommy"

For the most part, I have not been very vocal about my thoughts on birth. I have taken the stance of "women need to do what they are comfortable with" and "you need to do what is right for you." But lately I am amazed at the amount of criticism and misunderstanding surrounding my choice to give birth at home with a CPM. And while I do still hold to the believe that if a woman feels that the best place for her to give birth is in a hospital then that is where she needs to be. However, I am tired of women getting misinformation from the family, friends, and even the doctors that are supposed to be helping them.

I do not claim to be an authority on the subject. And I am not always good at expressing my point so that it comes across where others can understand what I am trying to say. But I am going to attempt to do my best.

I am saddened and enraged when I hear of my friends and family and how they have been treated by the obstetrics community. I am not naive. I know that things do not always turn out the way we think they will. But time after time I have seen, even with my own eyes, how the very person that a woman as trusted to help her give birth becomes the very thing that hurts her and her baby. And why? Are these doctors less educated? Do they not know their profession well enough? Have they not had enough study on how to help women give birth?

I believe they do know their profession well. They are in the profession to make money. And to make money, they do not need healthy patients. Healthy patients do not pay out enough. Now, let me be clear. I believe that there are some wonderful doctors out there. They truly care for their patients, and do well by them. But they are coming fewer and farther between.

The biggest reason that I have chosen midwives and home birth is because I don't want to become one of their numbers. I do not want to allow myself and my unborn baby to be subjected to numerous interventions that will then cause more problems, and turn into a case where even more interventions are needed to fix the very problem that they created to begin with. The movie The Business of Being Born stated it so well. If you are pregnant, will ever be pregnant, or know someone who is and have not watched this film and urge you to. Birth is a miracle, a rite of passage, a natural part of life. But birth is also big business.

I would like to know why America is so far behind other developed countries. Places like Denmark, Sweden, and the Netherlands midwifery is the primary model of care.

The organization of maternity services in Denmark, Sweden, and the Netherlands
was studied under the sponsorship of the World Health Organization European
Headquarters Office of Maternal and Child Health. Midwifery care is highly
respected and is a central feature of obstetric care in each of these countries.
In Denmark and Sweden, almost all births are in the hospital, and autonomous
midwives are employed by national health services. About three-quarters of Dutch
midwives are in independent practice, and 34% of Dutch women give birth at home.
In each country midwives provide "the first line" of care for normal pregnant
women and are viewed as essential to the excellent perinatal outcomes these
three countries enjoy."- Models of midwifery care. Denmark, Sweden, and The
Netherlands.

It should be noted, that the maternal mortality rate in Denmark was 5 deaths per 100,000 live births according to the World Health Organization's Maternal Mortality in 2000 report. Compare that to the United States where the maternal death rate was 17 deaths per 100,000 live births.

According to Citizens for Midwifery, a number of rigorous scientific studies
published in leading medical journals have found that for a healthy woman
having a normal pregnancy, a planned, midwife-attended home birth is as safe
as a hospital birth and with far lower rates of medical interventions.

So why does the American College of Obstetricians and Gynecologists continue to blast home births and CPMs? In the ACOG's Statement on Home births they imply that I am a bad mother because I am choosing an experience of the health of my baby.

"Childbirth decisions should not be dictated or influenced by what's fashionable, trendy, or the latest cause célèbre. Despite the rosy picture painted by home birth advocates, a seemingly normal labor and delivery can quickly become life-threatening for both the mother and baby. Attempting a vaginal birth after cesarean (VBAC) at home is especially dangerous because if the uterus ruptures during labor, both the mother and baby face an emergency situation with potentially catastrophic consequences, including death. Unless a woman is in a hospital, an accredited freestanding birthing center, or a birthing center within a hospital complex, with physicians ready to intervene quickly if necessary, she puts herself and her baby's health and life at unnecessary risk.

ACOG encourages all pregnant women to get prenatal care and to make a birth
plan. The main goal should be a healthy and safe outcome for both mother and
baby. Choosing to deliver a baby at home, however, is to place the process of
giving birth over the goal of having a healthy baby. For women who choose a
midwife to help deliver their baby, it is critical that they choose only
ACNM-certified or AMCB-certified midwives that collaborate with a physician to
deliver their baby in a hospital, hospital-based birthing center, or properly
accredited freestanding birth center. "

My biggest question from all of this is what about all the things that happen at the hospital? Take a moment to think about all of the births you have either experienced or heard about in a hospital setting. How many times do you hear the words, oh everything was so wonderful, nothing went wrong. I felt in control of my birth, and it was beautiful. My baby was alert and active afterwards and nursed easily. Almost never! However if you speak to mothers who have had the care of a midwife and had a home birth you will hear just that. Does this not seem a little odd to anyone else?

The biggest lie that women in our country have given in to is that they can't birth naturally. They are not able of handling the pain. (by the way, no one ever died from pain) That their bodies are designed to be able to deliver. That is simply not the case, and I look forward to the day when more women can stand up and say together, "We can birth our babies, and we can do so naturally!" I know that some women simply can't fathom having a child in their homes. But I would encourage them to find out why, not give in to fear, and do the research for themselves. Don't have your child anywhere simply because that is what someone else has told you to do. The second lie would be that you don't have the choice.

I have had two beautiful experiences with midwives. My first daughter was born at home with a CPM, and my second daughter was born at an independent birth center with a CPM. My family is looking forward to the birth of our third daughter then end of September, who will be born at home with the help of a CPM. I don't have all the answers, but I do know that I see a system of health care that is not working. People go to doctors to get help, and many many times, they end up worse off. I am not saying that all doctors are bad. Please hear me on this point. But having a baby usually is not a medical emergency. I believe that God made our bodies. And our bodies work when we take care of them.