Why am I awake

Its 4 am. And here I am.....awake....the girls are sleeping....



I am not....



After laying in bed, for a good 45 minutes, going to the bathroom for the second time...here I sit.



I look at some blogs....think about how long it takes my computer to load....wonder if I will ever get one that is faster...and decided to write.



Yesterday proved to be a great day. We made it to that birthday party, no one cared that we where a good 30 min late. (I had to go back into the house 3 times to get things that I had forgotten, and even then, once we had gotten down the road, I realized that I had forgotten sunscreen, and since it was a outdoor birthday party, at a park, in August, at 2:30pm, in Texas, we had to go back and get it.) But we had fun none the less. And best part of all, it wore Alyssa out. Don't you love it when the kids get a good work out chasing other kids around.



After the party we went to Walmart, since I needed ONE thing, and I hadn't been in the last 48 hours....(sometimes it seems like there is always a reason to go to walmart.) After about 30 minutes of walking around, threatening Alyssa to stop whining, and enjoying the fact that Makayla is fast asleep in her Ergo, I take the girls to the car while Hubby checks out. I put Alyssa in her car seat, walk around to put Makayla in, and Alyssa is already asleep.



Why, can't I fall asleep that fast? I am just as tired...(if not more)...and I have a nice comfortable bed. But once I wake up...then there are a hundred and one things to think about. Don't forget to call the bank first time in the morning. Will we get this house that we are looking at? Will we get into a house by Thanksgiving. Was that Alyssa I heard. Why does the dog always lay at my side on the foot of the bed. I loved seeing the pictures my friend recently sent, I can't believe how big the girls are getting, and how much I miss them since we moved. The list goes on and on...all these different things that I am thinking about. WHEN I SHOULD BE SLEEPING!!! I sit here and wonder if I have Adult ADD....and then decide that while I may have AADD, I probably won't ever do anything about it, like that one mole that I have been meaning to go to the doctor and have checked out...but haven't. Not because I couldn't, just because I can't ever remember to make the call, to get the appointment, when they are open...no that's the kind of thing that I remember at 4 am. So while there might be something that I could do about AADD, it won't happen because the only time I remember it is at 4am.

I check on Alyssa, and she is sleeping sitting up. She must have woken up, started to get out of bed, and fell back asleep. (is she mocking me?)

Hubby doesn't understand. His head hits the pillow and he is out. I learned early in our marriage that if I had anything that I needed to talk about, I better do it before he got in bed. Me, I need to let my mind defrag. Him, he is out...

Well, maybe I can go to sleep now. Most likely I will fall asleep about the time one of the girls wakes up. :P